I have not been visited by the graciously indiscriminate highlighter either. I no longer cry myself to sleep every night moaning why, why why and summers in southern France are just too hot to continue wearing my garb of sackcloth and ashes so I'm just trying to cope as best I can.

If, as you read this, you still have not been visited and need advice on dragging your self-esteem off the floor . . . probably best to seek it elsewhere.

I did enjoy your story though, one of the few pleasures in my pathetic unhighlighted life.