Sorry, I have a macabre, some would say sick, sense humour. Etching the recipe on the shell of a box turtle? Love it, but pull the other leg.

Any one of these pizzas would fill the bill for me right now--the village pizza van which arrives every Friday turns out pleasant enough pizza, but I don't want pleasant pizza. I want . . . never mind, I'm about to embark on another French food rant.

Good story!